I see England, I see France, I see someone’s penis.

May her toilets never over floweth.

Seriously! A Bunch of Nuts! That reminds me, has anyone seen my lithium? I’m feeling like setting the neighbor’s dog on fire again.

Because an old white man breaking into your house wasn’t creepy enough. 

Hope everyone survived the holidays! Remember, there’s no better way to say thank you to that family member (Mother-In-Law, cousin, weird uncle Frank) who gave you a crappy gift or reminded you of a painful childhood memory than to take some pictures of their crap!

 You can submit them here or by emailing crapatmyparentshouse@gmail.com!

Copy that, Mom. 

Submitted by one of the two awesome girls who created When Parents Text.

You know when you have a nightmare and you wake up, look around and tell yourself it was just a bad dream?

Well, It wasn’t. 

Just because he’s dead and stuffed doesn’t mean he can’t try to spread a little holiday cheer to those less fortunate. 

Nobody puts Baby in the corner.

This is how I earned my Bluebird “reanimation” badge.