Credenza! Right Ahead!

Because religious items don’t scare enough kids already.  

From the submitter: My parents used to keep this faceless nightmare of the Virgin Mary under the stairs when it wasnt the holiday season. I dont know if they could have tried harder to scar me!

Follow your dreams. 

Pulling the attached chord, you’ll hear cute phrases like ‘Bottle,’ ‘Mama,’ and ‘THE SEA WILL RUN RED WITH THE BLOOD OF THE NONBELIEVERS.’ 

His identity isn’t the only thing that’s protected.  

It’s an Annalee Doll called “Jumping Rick On Pogo Stick,” though it should be called “Someone Help This Poor Kid.”

Oh yeah, it costs $40 and you can buy one here if you think I’m lying. Make sure you read the product description, it’s pretty amazing. 

Someone went a little overboard with the gnomescaping. 

My Dad likes his coffee with sugar and a dash of majestic optimism. 

I think this is what you’d call a Lose-Lose situation. 

My parents take arts and crafts very seriously.  

Who wants a dreamcatcher?